Way back in the day, I began this blog as way to distract myself from the daily ups and downs of living with a degenerative illness that sometimes knocks me soundly on my butt. It took some time, but it has now become a much enjoyed part of my daily routine -- except on the days when headaches and seizures plague me like they have for most of this week.

I have made a conscious decision to avoid life on the pity pot. In this regard, I am absolutely Stoic. We often associate a lack of emotion with the Stoics, but these guys were far from emotionless; they just chose to avoid emotionalism through the use of logic, reason, and reflection. Like the Stoics, I know that I have no control over Chiari or what it does to me; however, I do have control over how I deal with it. I can make a conscious decision to perch perpetually on the pity pot, or I can choose to plop on the pity pot only as needed and to work with what I have and who I am now to the best of my ability the rest of the time. I nearly always choose the latter.

This past week, however, has seriously tried my determination to avoid feeling sorry for myself. I've had the hurts-to-breathe headaches every single day since Sunday. Thankfully, the medication has helped to bring them under control fairly quickly; however, they are so debilitating that it's hard for me to clear my head of the fog they bring and to focus on tasks. Add seizures, which I had on Tuesday and Wednesday, to the mix, and I become a real mess, really quickly.

To deal with the down time, I've learned to write my meme posts way ahead of time whenever possible and to schedule them to go live on the appropriate days. This makes my blog look like all is peachy keen in my little world, even when I'm curled up in a fetal position on the couch trying desperately to make the world go away. Unfortunately, what I can't do is respond to comments from the couch. And that is the whole purpose behind this post.

Peeps, it's been a miserable week, and I haven't been able to respond with any regularity to your comments. I am truly sorry. I know how important comments are in the blogosphere, really I do, and I appreciate every single one that is left for me. Please don't think that I'm not grateful or that I am ignoring what you have to say; this is not the case. If I don't reply to comments, it's because I'm looking for the toilet paper while I sit on the pity pot or because I'm playing roly-poly on the couch and haven't found a way to uncurl myself and still breathe.

So, here's to the end of the week:

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15 Responses
  1. RA Says:

    Thank you for sharing this post, Carleen. It feels like spoken from my heart. Hope it will be much more better for both of us. Have a wonderful weekend. Keep your spirits high :)

  2. The Bumbles Says:

    Isn't post scheduling a god send? I'm sorry that you have been suffering with pain this week. I think most bloggers out there know that not all comments can be responded to. It's the quality of the time spent with those you enjoy that means more to me.

  3. Anonymous Says:

    I'm so sorry to hear it's been a rotten week. I hope the weekend is better. I know what you mean about keeping up with commens on blogs. Sometimes it's all I can manage to read all my favorite blogs (I hate to miss even a day of reading) but I am not always able to write comments (or even write on my own blog for that matter!!). Feel better soon!!

  4. Anonymous Says:

    Zip...I have known this as I keep up with your blog and I know from some comments we have posted on each other's blog. I'm sorry you had such a horrible week but you survived it and with that will power of yours, you can beat anything. I know it's miserable and I know you need the meds as well but I sure hope you keep a positive outlook all the time, even when you are at your lowest. Don't ever think you have to apologize to me for not being able to comment as frequently or for that matter if you don't post or comment at all. I fully understand what you are dealing with and your health is so much more important than a blog. We will always be around you know that and so with that I also have to say that I don't play the pity party much either. I've been blunt and just treat you as I do everyone else. I don't know how to be any other way. I know I can be abrupt a lot of times and I know when to pull back and sympathize. YOu have become a friend of mine so quickly by sharing everything so quickly with me it's hard to not think of you as a friend for years already. Boy I need to stop rambling. Excellent post my friend. Aloha :)

  5. I hope you are feelng better soon. It isn't nice to be in pain. It is nice that we can Post-Date the blog when needed.

    Prayers being sent.

  6. Hootin Anni Says:

    Don't ever EVER feel the need to apologize for commenting OR comes first. And if it's making yourself mend and heal, well, then so be it. You lay on the couch, get better and forget about any hurt feelings...this is the way it is.

  7. Michele Says:

    I appreciate you coming by my blog. I understand your pain so much. I am there as well, believe me. I am currently on 600mg Dilantin for the Tonic clonics and 600 mg of Topamax for the Absence seizures and painful migraines. Helped the migraines immensely and cut back the Absence seizures more than half which is fine with me... the Dilantin has its ups and downs and I suffer Tonic clonics about 2-3 weeks which are usually severe enough to land me in hospital for 3 days. My Dilantin levels can't stabilize and seem to jump from 35 to 66 and it's frustrating. I go for blood pokes every 2 weeks. The Albumin levels in my liver seem to be the culprit so we may have a problem there but I'm not even going to think about that right now!
    My seizures are caused by blows to the head as a young girl from bad parents but life goes on... it's a struggle some days but I'm thankful for what I have today, a loving husband and great blog friends.
    You can come and see me out on the blogs anytime you like.


  8. Lee Shin Says:

    spot on with this write-up, i like the way you discuss the things. i'm impressed, i must say. i'll probably be back again to read more. thanks for sharing this with us.

    Lee Shin

  9. boneless Says:

    So happy to be given a privilege to post a comment here.

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