My list is inspired by song from the Dixie Chicks' album, Taking the Long Way.




I hope . . .

(1) . . . that the people who face the possibility of losing their homes will find the help they need in time.

(2) . . . that I will one day scale Laundry Mountain, conquering it once and for all.

(3) . . . that the fleas of a thousand camels will infest the armpits of Kanye West for his lack of civility during and after the VMAs.

(4) . . . that General Motors' new marketing plan succeeds in helping to rebuild buyers' confidence in their products so that the company doesn't go completely under.

(5) . . . that the cold I am fighting off doesn't amount to much of anything.

(6) . . . that this latest stock market rally lasts long enough for folks to recover at least a significant portion of what they lost when it collapsed several months ago.

(7) . . . that summer leaves soon so that fall can arrive!

(8) . . . that more people will start to live by the notion that wanting for your neighbor what you want for yourself is a good thing.

(9) . . . that the heatwave we're supposed to experience over the next few days isn't bad enough to trigger more fires.

(10) . . . that in our upcoming gubernatorial election, we Californians will remember that just because someone has experience on the big screen doesn't mean that he or she will know what to do in the big house in Sacramento!

(11) . . . that our latest container, which is scheduled to arrive at the port in Long Beach in the second week of October, doesn't have a long and drawn out hold up at Customs -- we need the products in it like last week!

(12) . . . that I get a chance to learn how to sync my Google calendar to my iPhone this weekend.

(13) . . . that the Muslims of the world have a wonderful Eid celebration! For those who don't know, Eid is the holiday that comes at the end of Ramadan, the month of fasting.

Just a few things I've been thinking about . . .


What makes The Brain think it's the boss?
Last week was a real humdinger from start to finish. With so much unusual excitement going on, I should have been prepared for The Brain to take control and to push me into the passenger seat. At least this time The Brain held off on the electrical surges until Thursday night; the only bad thing about it waiting so long is that the surges are worse than normal -- as if seizures are ever normal per se. I don't like it when The Brain takes over, but that's life; I'll continue to deal with it as best I can.


Why are people so willing to believe what they hear without bothering to investigate the facts?


Watching the debate over health care reform devolve from discussion to organized shouting matches has made me pull out my much used and well loved copy of John Stewart Mill's essay On Liberty and to reread his discussion of the Tyranny of the Majority, because I see its bud fully flowering on this single issue in a way that it hasn't for quite some time.

The "people" who exercise the power are not always the same people with those over whom it is exercised; and the "self-government" spoken of is not the government of each by himself, but of each by all the rest. The will of the people, moreover, practically means the will of the most numerous or the most active part of the people; the majority, or those who succeed in making themselves accepted as the majority; the people, consequently, may desire to oppress a part of their number; and precautions are as much needed against this as against any other abuse of power. The limitation, therefore, of the power of government over individuals loses none of its importance when the holders of power are regularly accountable to the community, that is, to the strongest party therein. This view of things, recommending itself equally to the intelligence of thinkers and to the inclination of those important classes in European society to whose real or supposed interests democracy is adverse, has had no difficulty in establishing itself; and in political speculations "the tyranny of the majority" is now generally included among the evils against which society requires to be on its guard.

When a group, whether numerically greater or not, gains enough power to assert its authority over others and uses that power to silence dissenting voices, we have Tyranny of the Majority. Since tyranny is the antithesis of liberty, and something that Americans take an inordinate amount of pride in "removing" from the world, why do we allow it to happen in our own back yard?

Among other things, controlled experiments on tyranny have shown that

• Tyranny can be implemented and exercised by normal people.
• Tyranny is more likely when people are competing for insufficient resources.
• Tyranny is more likely when the tyrants have little empathy for the tyrannized.
• Tyranny is more likely by stealth by those in power than by coup. (Source)
  

The folks who are showing up at town hall meetings with the sole purpose of shouting down their elected officials or acting as the spokeshole for a special interest group (insurance industry, pharmaceutical company, et al) are, for the most part, quite normal people, I'm sure. Yet once they have had their daily dose of Rush and O'Reilly, they feel empowered enough to behave like tyrants, silencing all who disagree with them, in a controlled environment such as a town hall meeting.

To say that people are competing for insufficient resources in these difficult economic times is, perhaps, to use an old cliche, the understatement of the century. Because of fear mongering further compounded by the fact that the average American is too lazy to search for factual information independently and thus, like so many lemmings, is willing to throw himself off the cliff without cause.

Empathy is having the capacity to understand, be sensitive to, and feel the experience of someone else. When the economy is bad and people are concerned about making their own mortgage payments, putting food on their own tables, and meeting the needs of their own families, empathy often gets lost in the daily struggle. The problem is that the same people who struggle to make ends meet but have health insurance are the very ones who ought to have the greatest empathy for their uninsured fellow Americans who find themselves having to choose between paying for a doctor visit or a prescription and making a house payment or buying groceries!

The special interest groups on both sides of the health care reform issue resort to stealth by spreading misinformation anonymously. It doesn't take long before the lemmings leap into panic mode and once they pick up the ball, the lobbyists can sit back and enjoy the show as they pat themselves on the back for a job well done; they know that to stage a successful coup, they need only to strike fear into the hearts of the lemmings who can be relied upon to take them at their word without ever bothering to research the facts themselves.

God protect us all from the lemmings of the world irrespective of the side of the political spectrum on which they sit!


What am I missing?

So my laptop is up and running again. All the software has been reinstalled, the file folders created, the desktop organized and decorated just the way I like it. It's even running much faster than it was pre-hacker / Trojan. I should be happy, right? Bleh -- that would work in someone else's world, not mine! Something is missing, I just know it! The problem is that I can't put my finger on what I've forgotten, and it's making me crazy. You know what it's like when you can't remember a song or movie title and it sticks in your head until you do? It's like that with the missing software. I know that I neglected to reinstall something, but what? I don't know! I guess it will hit me on the head like a sledgehammer when I go to use it and can't find it -- then I'll know what I forgot to install!



"Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph." -- Thomas Paine

It's been a few days since I had the chance to do anything but my regular memes, so it's time for me to play catch up. Let me tell you what's going on in my world.

Betty's condition is improving. Because she can't eat by herself, a feeding tube was inserted through her nose and into her stomach. Even though she was seriously drugged for the pain, she didn't like the tube and managed to pull it out a couple of days ago. Rather than put it back in, the vigilant nurses have been feeding her whenever she's awake and alert. It worked like a charm. She is now alert and talking, which means that she will be moved from ICU to a regular room once the chest tubes are removed. That should happen today or tomorrow.


I had some real excitement on Thursday afternoon with my retirement paperwork. In the midst of Betty's illness and my going back and forth to the hospital, I received a letter from the retirement agency indicating that they had received my application and asking that I contact the university's HR department to request that they not remove me from the insurance roll while the application is processed. So on Wednesday afternoon, I did as instructed. Much to my surprise, I got a response from the HR person who helped me take care of the retirement paperwork indicating that the university can't do what CALPERS had requested. It took several phone calls and faxes for me to learn that although I should have been removed from the insurance roll on July 1, a mistake that I made has worked in my favor. Because I turned in the application paperwork directly to CALPERS, the university doesn't know that I am retiring; therefore, I am still on the books, so to speak. No lapse in insurance coverage, which the only reason that I took an early retirement in the first place! Big sigh of relief.

The sorry state of my state has gotten worse. I didn't think it was possible; I was wrong.

• California still does not have a budget.
• We have no money to meet our financial obligations and such a bad credit rating that borrowing is not a possibility.
• Unemployment is now just above 10%.
• Our sales tax was recently raised to help raise funds but since so many people are worried about losing their jobs, they are not shopping enough for it to do any good.
• We're in the third year of a drought so bad that water rationing will likely happen before the end of summer.
• Just yesterday, I heard on the local news that the consistent increase in water temperatures on our side of the Pacific Ocean have made 2009-2010 officially an El Nino year. Rather than go into all the details now, I'm going to use the Thursday Thirteen meme to talk more about El Nino and its effects on the Golden State. Let's just say that it gets really ugly around here when El Nino pays us a visit.
• Our fire season, which normally starts in September and goes through October, has started early. The dry brush, thanks to the drought, on the hills and mountains surrounding Los Angeles, coupled with the outward sprawl that occurred over the past decade, has set up ideal conditions for a far more threatening fire season than normal. It doesn't surprise me that the hills have started burning three months earlier tha usual.

My headaches seem to be under control for the time being. This is a very good thing. Does the absence of headaches mean that everything is well and good? This is my life, peeps -- nothing in it is well and good at the same time! The stress factor is currently high and with stress comes headaches, seizures, and eczema. It's been several days since I had a headache, but The Brain doesn't like to play understudy to my life for very long; therefore, It makes its presence known through seizures. Thankfully, the four that I've had in as many days haven't been too bad. Now the eczema, my body's stress-o-meter, isn't doing as well as the headaches and seizures. I'll save you the gory details and say only that my hands are covered with a rash and blisters that itch like mad. And now, add to the seizures and eczema a sciatic nerve issue that is giving me grief at the area of the right hip. Yesterday was w complete waste because the pain was so bad, I used a couple of Naprosen to help me get out of bed and later, off my chair. In spite of all this, things could be so much worse.

Here's wishing everyone a great weekend!

Just a few things I've been thinking about. . .


It didn't take long for the conspiracy theorists to start doing their work on the death of Michael Jackson! Why is it that we have such a hard time accepting the fact that even icons die and that sometimes, their deaths are the result of decisions they made or actions they took?


Bernie Madoff's sentencing hearing is today. I'm still wondering why his ill-gotten assets haven't been taken and sold to repay at least a small portion of the money that he stole? If the man has been convicted of fraud and evidence shows that these assets were purchased after he began the Ponzi scheme, why would his wife or children be allowed to keep anything that was bought with stolen money?


Later today, Lieutenant Dan Choi, a West Point grad who was recently discharged from the New York National Guard for being openly gay, will have the opportunity to argue his case before a special board. Lt. Choi, a specialist in Arabic and a combat vet, stands to lose all of the veteran's benefits that he earned during his time in service. Where is the justice in that? And what happened to repealing "Don't Ask, Don't Tell"?


In two days, the State of California will be bankrupt. Our state's credit rating has dropped so low that the possibility of getting loans to keep us afloat is out of the question. Even though I am now retired, the state still owes me two months salary from my last contract. Will I become a victim to the mismanagement of state funds come Wednesday, when my paycheck should be deposited into my bank account?

• Gawd, the heat is back! Camry, the otherwise loveable kitty, is in heat again. This time, though, she's gone beyond the chirping of a week or so ago and has moved up to the full on cat calling. She rolls all over the floor, yowls at my feet, and walks with her hind end up in the air as if it's on display for every Tom in the household. Unfortunately for her, the only Tom is Marlowe, who was neutered several years ago and would rather play chase the mouse than set up house. I keep telling myself that it's only a few more days until her spay appointment, but I don't know if I can last that long. I had completely forgotten how utterly obnoxious female cats in heat can be!



• The Brain is still throwing its weight around. I spent much of the weekend fighting off headaches. Sunday looked really promising, as I didn't wake up with a headache as I have been; however, the headache's kissing cousin showed up after I had been awake for about an hour. Same thing on Monday. I woke up with a headache shortly after one, had a seizure at 1:24 a.m., then another at 3:48 a.m. Although I had been headache free since about noon, another seizure came at 7:16 p.m. You know, The Brain is beginning to remind me of those crazy dictators in North Korea and Iran -- throw its weight around long enough to make me nervous, then slink away to watch the worry that follows. Thankfully, Dr. S will be on call for a week starting on the 19th, and that's when she's going to do her best to squeeze me in to see her.
  


• I'm not a big fan of Western movies. Never have been. I wasn't inspired to watch them when, as a kid, I learned that the Red Ryder Round-Up, the annual rodeo in my dad's hometown of Pagosa Springs, Colorado, was held in honor of Fred Harman, an elderly man I knew who also happened to be a famous author and illustrator of a comic book series of the same name. Heck, Mr. Harman's creation has maintained its fame thanks to one young boy's obsession with getting a Red Ryder BB gun for Christmas. Still, I wasn't interested in watching cowboy movies. Even when John Wayne filmed The Cowboys in Pagosa and my grandmother called to tell us that she had lunch with him, I wasn't really interested in seeing the movie. I've seen it since then, though. Anyway, the only Western movie that I can honestly say I feel is worth watching is Lonesome Dove, based on Larry McMurtry's novel of the same name. I saw the movie when it first aired on television, then bought and read the book. It was every bit as awesome as the movie. So when I learned that a 20th anniversary airing of Lonesome Dove was on this weekend, I watched it twice -- between naps!
  


• I've been itching to change my blog template and design. I really want a 3-column design that has the post portion sandwiched between two sidebar columns, but I haven't found one that I like yet. If only I weren't graphically challenged, I'd design one myself! Alas, until I overcome the challenge of the puny-pixelled or win the lottery and can afford to pay for a customized one, the quest for a freebie continues.


• Am I the only one who thinks the whole David Letterman vs. Sarah Palin, et al is ridiculous? Considering that the economy is floundering, we're fighting a couple of wars in foreign countries, North Korea is issuing thinly-veiled nuclear threats, Iran is in an upheaval over the possibility of a rigged election, and we can't figure out how to ensure that all Americans have access to affordable medical care, don't you think that Governor Palin's rhetoric would be better served addressing some of these issues instead of a couple of jokes made by a late night talk show host? If this is a taste of what's to come should she become the Republican front-runner for the next presidential election, I want to buy stock in the production company that handles the soap opera version!
  

• Today is California's special election for six ballot propositions, each designed to raise taxes enough to help cover the state's current fiscal crisis. I love the Golden State to be sure, but I don't love her politicians enough to help them pay for the mess they've created! So in a few hours, when the polls open, I'll be telling the Governator where he can take those propositions and what he can do with them when he arrives there!

• Happy Anniversary to my dad and stepmom. They got married on my birthday so, he says, my dad won't ever forget their anniversary!
• The second phase of the grading marathon is well underway. My goal is to have graded and returned all of the research papers that I collected on Thursday of last week no later than tomorrow. One class is done, and the other one is in progress. Yeah me!
• I'm keeping an eye on the swarm of earthquakes happening in the South Bay area. Not that I'm worried about the "big" one, but it sure is interesting to see how the quakes correlate to our freaky weather. Judging from the number and strengths of the temblors in the last 48 hours, something big is brewing beneath us.
  
• At the lunch meeting of the Fourth Grade BFFs on Saturday, we were so busy talking and catching up that none of us thought to take a single picture! It wasn't until I got home and Ali asked me to see the pictures, that I realized I had none to show. I tried to schedule a quick meeting to get some photos, but Peggy doesn't seem to be checking her email and neither I or Diana have a phone number to call her.

Happy Tuesday, y'all! If you'd like to join in the fun of random ramblings, just post a few random thoughts on Tuesday. Send me the link to your post by leaving a comment, and I'll add you to the list of Random Ramblers!

"I'm going to California where they sleep out every night," sang Jimmie Rodgers in his "Blue Yodel No. 4 (California Blues)." In 1929, when the "singing brakeman" recorded this song, California was still the Golden State and attracted tens of thousands of new residents each year. Whether it was the lure of a mild climate, the promise of job opportunities, or visions of the silver screen, people wanted to come to California. But that was 1929, eighty years ago. In 2009, not many people are "going to California where they sleep out every night."

For the past four years, California has lost more residents to other states than it has gained from them. And although a net loss of 144,000 in 2008 isn't such a large number considering that our population is close to 40 million, it does give us the dubious distinction of ranking first on a list of states whose residents are leaving in search of greener pastures at a higher rate than residents of other states arrive here in search of them. Thanks to births and immigration, both legal and illegal, California's population is still on the rise overall, but it has lost some of the appeal and attractiveness to people considering a state-to-state move.

The past four years of steady flight out of state is just one more reflection of the obvious: something is dreadfully wrong in California! I love the state where I was born and raised and because I do, I worry about its future. The November 2008 unemployment rate for California reached 8.4%, placing us third behind Michigan (9.6%) and Rhode Island (9.4%). Our budget deficit, according to the Governator's State of the State speech (1-15-09), has shot up to $40 BILLION through 2010. California's deficit is larger than the operating budgets of every single state in the Union but New York! The San Jose Mercury News has a fantastic article putting the numbers in their proper perspectives, and all I can say about it is that they are frightening.

Toto, we may not be in Kansas anymore, but we're not heading for California!

With the wedding nearly here (one part this afternoon and the other tomorrow), let's just say that hectic has taken on a whole new meaning around my house. As a result, I haven't had time to check my email as often as I normally do. So yesterday afternoon, in a brief moment of respite from the whirlwind while Ali went to pick up his suits, Magdy went to fetch his tux, and Iman went to get her wedding gown, I took a moment to check my personal email.

Like most people who use the internet far more than they probably should, I have email addresses for different things: one for work related matters, a personal one for family chats, one for groups, etc. To coordinate these various email accounts, I rely on Gmail to pull all of the messages into one single account which makes it much easier to manage them all. And while Gmail does a great job of sorting and filtering all the messages, the majority of them end up in a folder called ALL MAIL. I don't always remember to check this folder because most of the mail that ends up there is junk anyway, but for some reason I decided to check it yesterday and much to my surprise, I found a message from my department chair asking if I could take Tuesday/Thursday afternoon class.

Excuse me?! Can I take the second class that I was begging, and I do mean literally


for so that I don't lose my health care coverage? The one class for one semester that I begged for just so that I can retire at the end of the semester with my benefits and never have to worry about being able to afford medical treatment and medication ever again? You're kidding, right?

I responded with a single word: "Gladly."

I've never been one to make New Year's resolutions, and I'm not going to start now. Instead of resolving to do something that I know will be forgotten in a week or two, I prefer to reflect on the good, the bad, and the ugly of the past year. George Santayana said that those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it and while history has proven the truth of his statement, what we learn doesn't always have to be negative; we could also take our lessons from the things that went right. As 2008 joins the annals of history and 2009 is born, here's my top picks for the events with lessons learned for the year.

The Good
1. The times, they really ARE a changin'! The election of Barack Obama is proof positive that we've come a long way since the days when I remember L.A. burning.

2. I can make it through a whole year without a single surgery or hospital stay. That, in and of itself, is cause for celebration!

3. The Ibrahim girls make fantastic traveling companions. Iman, Basma, and I had a wonderful time on our summer road trip to Texas. It was also on this trip that I learned the importance of cruise control. Long story. . .

4. Randy Pausch's last lecture. Because celebrating a life and leaving a positive legacy is a lesson from which we can all benefit.

5. The difficulties that Chiari patients face made headlines with the story of the little boy who didn't sleep for four years.

The Bad
1. The Top 25 Censored Stories for 2008. Lesson to be learned: the press isn't nearly as free as we'd like to think it is!

2. It's more than the economy, stupid. The worst financial crisis since the Great Depression gained attention midway through the year. Unfortunately, this one is a lesson that still needs to be taught. I've got my fingers crossed on this one.

3. $45 billion in damage from the 2008 Atlantic hurricane season. The only place in Texas that I can honestly say I enjoy is Galveston, so it was with a great deal of sadness that I watched as Hurricane Ike pummeled the island this summer. Lesson to be learned on this one? If you live anywhere near the hurricane coast, pull up stakes and come to earthquake country! It's so much safer here!

The Ugly
1. We Californians have such an unhealthy fascination with celebrities that we vote them into the State's highest office -- twice! Our esteemed Governator's lack of leadership has made a bad economic situation turn downright u-g-l-y. The Golden State will likely run out of money in February 2009, and the Governator is powerless to fix the problem. The lesson to take away from this mess is a simple one: don't spend money you don't have!

2. Bernard Madoff. Need I say more on this one?

3. My inability to sleep must surely make this list not just because it gives me such a miserable time, but because the luggage hanging around under my eyes is just downright ugly!

Off with the old, and on with the new. Happy new year, everyone!

"From where you sit, the inside of the White House may look as untidy as the inside of a stomach. As is said of the legislative process, sausage-making and policy-making shouldn't be seen close-up. Don't let that panic you. Things may be going better than they look from the inside." -- Donald Rumsfield

Just when I thought I could relax a little and enjoy what's left of the break between the fall and spring semesters, I received a bombshell in my email box yesterday afternoon. And it wasn't just any old bombshell, either -- it was the bombshell, the one big enough to cause me to reach for the panic button.

Due to a combination of low enrollment (more than likely caused by the declaration of impaction from the CSU chancellor in response to the fiscal crisis) and further budget cuts, my teaching load for the spring semester has been reduced from 3 classes and an independent study to 1 class and an independent study. Don't get me wrong, please-- I am grateful that I still have a job for one more semester, I really am. What has me reaching for the panic button is the fact that my greatest fear is now a reality: I will soon lose my health care coverage.

A California Carol nicely sums up the situation.

A few days ago, the esteemed (*ahem*) governor of the Golden State, in defense of his proposed solutions to California's budget crisis, sent a letter to state employees (like me) to explain that the "emergency steps" he seeks to put into place "will require sacrifice from everyone." I am of the belief that it is better to be forced to take two unpaid days off each month and keep one's benefits than it is to join the increasing unemployment rolls and if this were an option for me, I wouldn't complain too much about it. I could deal with the loss of two days pay each month as long as I didn't lose my health care benefits. Unfortunately, the "sacrifice" that the Governator is asking of me, and others in the same situation who teach in the CSU system, is to take a much more significant cut in pay due to budget cuts that have forced campuses to cancel classes plus risk losing our health care benefits.

I need to teach at least two classes (6 units) per semester to maintain my health care benefits. While several family members suggested that I avail myself of the opportunity to go on disability, I prefer to teach as long as I can. In order to teach and keep my health insurance, I requested a reduced load from my department chair following the Chiari diagnosis and subsequent decompression surgery in 2006. A reduction in my teaching load would mean a reduction of stress, which in turn would reduce the likelihood of headaches and seizures and allow me to continue teaching. This plan worked well for me and my department until this fall semester when my load was reduced from two classes to just one due to budget cuts. Had it not been for the fact that I was able to pick up another class in a different department, I would have lost my health care benefits in August.

Anyone with a pre-existing condition will understand the panic I felt at the thought of losing my health care. At this point, I am uninsurable thanks to the myriad pre-existing conditions precipitated by the Chiari and Epilepsy. Without health insurance, there is no way in hell that Ali and I could afford to cover my medical expenses out of pocket. And if I were to go the disability route, Ali, who also has issues that require long-term care and medication, would be in the same boat as I -- no coverage and uninsurable on private plans. Knowing this, I contacted HR to check out my options. What I learned is that my twelve years of service (eleven of which included 9-15 units per semester) when combined with my 50th birthday this coming May makes me eligible for an early retirement WITH all my benefits! Although I truly do not want to retire so early, I see no other viable options that will guarantee I keep health insurance. And so, I plan to end my teaching career at the conclusion of the Spring 2009 semester.

So Mr. Governator, please don't ask me to make any more sacrifices. Don't red-line the CSU budget any further than you already have for in doing so, you place my very health at risk. If I am unable to keep two classes for the upcoming semester, I will lose my health care benefits, and even retirement won't protect me; in order to retire with benefits, I must be on the insurance plan at the time of retirement!

"We're in the middle of a serious financial crisis. Without immediate action by Congress, America could slip into a financial panic. Ultimately, our country could experience a long and painful recession." -- G.W. Bush

"The fundamentals of our economy are strong." -- John McCain

"The top of our economy is broken." -- John McCain

"This turmoil is a major threat to our economy and its ability to create good-paying jobs and help working Americans pay their bills, save for their future, and make their mortgage payments." -- Barack Obama


With the current economic situation heading further down the fast track to disaster with each passing day, is it any wonder that I'm feeling the need to change my name to Chicken Little?